Funny stories about shopping JOKES INSTRUCTIONS

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Funny stories about shopping (JOKES)

INSTRUCTIONS

WHEN MEN AT SHOPPING MALL "I'D LIKE TO BUY SOME GLOVES FOR MY WIFE, " THE YOUNG MAN SAID, EYEING THE ATTRACTIVE SALESGIRL, "BUT I DON'T KNOW HER SIZE. “ "WILL THIS HELP? " SHE ASKED SWEETLY, PLACING HER HAND IN HIS. "OH, YES, " HE ANSWERED. "HER HANDS ARE JUST SLIGHTLY SMALLER THAT YOURS. “ "WILL THERE BE ANYTHING ELSE? " THE SALESGIRL QUERIED AS SHE WRAPPED THE GLOVES. "NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, " HE REPLIED, "SHE ALSO NEEDS A BRA AND PANTIES. "

SHOPPING WITH YOUR HUSBAND IS LIKE HUNTING WITH GAME WARDEN.

SHE BOUGHT IT ON SPECIAL A woman goes into Wal-Mart and tells the clerk she wants a refund for the toaster she bought because it doesn’t work. The clerk tells her that he can’t give her a refund because she bought it on special. All of a sudden, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming “GRAB MY BREASTS!” The clerk, not knowing what to do, runs to get the store manager. The Manager comes up to the Woman and asks, “What’s wrong? ” ! She explains the situation with the toaster. He tells her that he can’t give her a refund because she bought it on special. Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming, “GRAB MY BREASTS!” In shock, the store manager pleads, “Ma’am, why are you saying that? ” In a huff, the woman says, “BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY BREASTS GRABBED WHEN I’M GETTING SCREWED!

WE ALWAYS HOLD HANDS. IF I LET GO, SHE SHOPS.

AT HALF PRICE A husband wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 'What do you think you're doing? ' asks the wife. 'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans, ' he replies. 'Put them back, we can't afford them, ' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping. A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket. 'What do you think you're doing? ' asks the husband. 'It's my face cream. It makes me look sexy and beautiful for you when we're making love, ' replies the wife. Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser. . . at half the price. '

SHOPPING WITH WIFE AND BABY.

SHOPPING PROBLEMS

HELP FOR WOMEN

FUNNY THING TO DO AT WALL MART 1. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway? " 2. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose. 3. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out. 4. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!" 5. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles. 6. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

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