Constructive and Destructive Behavior in Negotiation and Business

Constructive and Destructive Behavior in Negotiation and Business Communication Lection 2

Plan • • • Constructive behaviour Speaking Listening Destructive behaviour Types of destructive behaviour Manipulative ploys Verbal ploys Conclusion

Literature • Gavin Kennedy “New Negotiation Edge” • Gavin Kennedy “Kennedy on Negotiation” • Fisher and Ury “Getting to Yes”

What is negotiation? • To negotiate is to trade something we have for something we want (Oxford dictionary) • The process by which we search for the terms to obtain what we want from somebody who wants something from us (Gavin Kennedy) • Back and forth communication to reach agreement where some interests are shared and some interests are opposed

Part 1 CONSTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOUR

The most effective negotiators - Search for the information about the subject of the communication - Tell about fears, problems they are anxious about - Check the comprehension - Summarize the dialogue

Speaking • Express your opinion • Suggest the subject, speaking about your needs and goals • Correct and change the unacceptable elements • Rank and group the questions • Summarise

Actions of Verbal Communication • • Taking communicative role Delivery of the communicative role Keeping the communicative role Demanding the communicative role

You can take or deliver communicative role • When the statement is finished • During the pause • When the interlocutor gives you special signs (sits down, leans back on the chair)

If you don’t want to give up the communicative role • • Say that you need to tell a lot Name the questions you want to touch Excuse me, I haven’t finished yet! Speak fast, without intervals

Listening • Fix the main actions • Fix the actions people don’t do • Study the ideas of your partners • Learn the method of your partner • Answer the questions: - What does it say about the relationships between us? - How does the relationship affect what I hear? - What does the message reveal about the speaker? - What does the speaker want to see happening?

Active Listening Techniques • Encouraging – to show interest. • Clarifying. • Paraphrasing – to show you understand^ to check your interpretation, to help the speaker “hear” what she/he has been saying. • Reflecting - to show that you understand how the speaker feels. • Summarising – to review progress, to establish a basis of future discussion. • Affirming – to support and appreciate the efforts and actions of your partner.

Part 2 DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOUR

Types of Destructive Behaviour • • • Irritation Interruption Disagreement Blocking Aggression Threats

Manipulative ploys • They aim to influence your expectations of the negotiated outcome. • A ploy neutralised is a ploy defeated • Power and verbal ploys

Power ploys • Everything says you are in a very important place • Preconditions – you must accept them! If not the negotiations won’t take place • Non-negotiable questions • Pressing • Mother Hubbard

Verbal Ploys • • Popularity Competence Changing the subject Ad hominem argument Source Dangerous way Sample proof

Decision Making Tools for Negotiation • Persuasion: Usually the first method we choose when we want something. Useful when interests or opinions are the same. • Giving in: This is not the easy way out, and sometimes it’s just not worth continuing if the cost (in any terms) is too high. • Coercion: This could simply be stating your options, ‘I could take my business elsewhere’. It could also be gentle reminders or unspecified consequences right up to threats. • Problem Solving: Works well when both parties have a strong relationship, where you trust each other, and share the problem.

Three Types of Behaviour RED BLUE Manipulation Aggressive Exploitation Always seeking the best for you No concern for person you are negotiating with Taking People behave in this manner when they fear exploitation by the other party, but by behaving this way to protect themselves, they provoke the behaviour they are trying to avoid Interest-based approach -collaboration Cooperation Trusting Pacifying Relational Giving PURPLE Give me some of what I want (red) I’ll give you some of what you want ( blue ) Deal with people as they are not how you think they are Good intentions Two way exchange Purple behaviour incites purple behaviour Open

Negotiation Styles HIGH COLLABORATE ACCOMODATE Problem solved creatively, aiming for win-win Characteristics: Build friendly relationship Search for common interests Characteristics: Problem-solving behaviours Promote harmony Recognising both parties’ needs Avoid substantive differences CONCERN FOR RELATIONSHIP Give into pressure to save relationship Synergistic solutions COMPROMISE Place relationship above fairness of the outcomes Split the difference Characteristics: Meeting half way AVOID Take whatever you can get/Inaction Characteristics: Feeling of powerlessness Look for trade offs Accept half-way measures Aims to reduce conflict rather than problem solve synergistically Indifference to the result DEFEAT Be a winner at any cost/Competitive Characteristics: Win-Lose competition Pressure/Intimidation Resignation, surrender Adversarial relationships Take what the other party is willing to concede Defeating the other becomes a goal for the negotiator Withdraw & remove = behaviour of negotiator LOW Win-win becomes the main purpose of the negotiator CONCERN FOR SUBSTANCE HIGH

Conclusion • Negotiation is a communication reach agreement. • Constructive behaviour is based on expressing your opinion, questioning, active listening, exchange of opinions. • Destructive behaviour is based on manipulation, pressing, aggression.